4 questions to ask when you feel off-purpose
Feel like you want to quit? Try this first
When you feel disconnected and "off-path" you may start thinking it must be a sign to quit, that surely this sense of dissatisfaction is a sure sign to leave the situation causing such angst. The mind will quickly respond to such uncomfortable feelings, thinking "I need to fix this situation"… but the outcome could be drastically different if instead you asked: "how can I understand these feelings?"
Our feelings are an intuitive nudge —even the uncomfortable ones— and so we need to go deeper into the feelings rather than employ our mind to fix, solve or avoid them. Instead, ask these feelings why they're here and what they want you to know... THEN, you can determine if your feelings are really a sign to get out, or just reroute.
I wanted to quit, but changed my mind by doing this
I have a confession to make: recently, I really wanted to quit.
I questioned my purpose and wondered if I had anything left to offer. I felt exhausted, uninspired, stuck, and honestly, like a fraud.
Truth was, what I used to consider meaningful ways to invest my time and energy stopped delivering returns. I just wasn't really feeling it anymore.
I was still generally heading in the right direction, but had veered off path, even if only the smallest of degrees. But over time, that smallest degree off-path can really change the outcome or destination.
If this sounds familiar, you may be on the same very slippery slope I recently found myself on — but you can quickly course correct —as long as you don't see it as a sign to quit but instead as a sign to reroute.
How to realign with your life purpose
As someone who has had to move through this feeling many times and literally written the book on it, here’s what I did to pull myself away from the brink of throwing it all in, and instead, come back to myself and my values to see where I could find more meaning.
Grab your journal and pondered your answers to these questions.
What are your values?
Make a list of your values. If you’ve never done this exercise before it’s incredibly eye-opening (and heart-opening). If you’ve done it before, but not for a while, you might realise as I did how much your values change over time.
Looking over my updated list of values, I could quite clearly see that I was holding myself accountable today according to the values of a previous version of me. No wonder I felt off-path!
Do your actions and values match?
Even if your values haven't changed, you may find that what you're busying yourself with doesn't really matter to you, or doesn’t really help you feel how you want to feel. My self-imposed to-do list and some commitments no longer reflected my values and who I am now. To be sure, not all responsibilities can simply be ditched, but some could. For everything else, I found value in them.
I also came back to the basics of planning my days with head and heart. Yes, there are real-world to-dos and real-world consequences when they don’t happen. But, if we can bring a hefty dose of our deeper desires, needs and wants to the fore and include them in our planning, it can make a world of difference… without having to quit!
What do you think the problem is?
Talking about head and heart, this question brings the head back into play… List all the things your mind tells you are preventing you from how you want to feel.
For example:
“There’s no way this will ever change because (insert belief/excuse here)”.
“I’m not qualified/good enough to do what I really want, so I’m stuck here.”
“Life isn’t meant to be easy and work isn’t meant to be fun.”
After you make a list of your own beliefs about why you can’t change the situation, question if these beliefs are actually true. Maybe that belief was something you grew up hearing (like work isn’t mean to be fun, for example) but as an adult, you’ve seen plenty of evidence to suggest many people do find their work fun… so it can’t be 100% true, right?
Are there simple changes that might clear the block?
For example:
“There’s no way this will ever change because (insert belief/excuse here)” might become “In order to make a change, I need to change how I see it.”
“I’m not qualified/good enough to do what I really want, so I’m stuck here” might become “I am good enough” or “I have the power to change my circumstances by focusing on improving my skills.”
“Life isn’t meant to be easy and work isn’t meant to be fun” might become “i enjoy my life and am working on improving it.”
Busting through the blocks —limiting beliefs, stagnant energy, judgement —may need some outside help, which is what my Path & Purpose Sessions are for.
POSITIVE AFFIRMATION
“Having fun helps me relax and see my life from a different perspective. I have fun in everything I do.” — from The Little Sage Oracle Cards
4. What sparks joy?
With an idea of what’s holding you back, an idea of what you really want, you’re now tasked with thinking about all the things that spark joy in you. They may not be the obvious answer as an alternative to say your job, or relationship, but when we spend time doing things we love and enjoy, it helps to reset our vibrational set point. Leaning into a lightened and brightened life, brings feelings of expansion again, and these start to fill up the spaces instead of all those things on your to-do list that can’t be changed, or removed yet. After reflecting on these questions, I realised (as I already knew deep inside) that I didn't really need to change my path, just my alignment to it.
“Remember, purpose isn’t measured by the perceived value of what we give, share or produce, but rather by the value we experience when expressing it.”
When it comes to remembering our purpose, and realigning ourselves with what feels good for us, it’s important to remember that we are more than we think, that we are souls having arrived here with a very particular purpose, as well as lessons and gifts. Remembering this is our ultimate purpose.
FREE AUDIO JOURNEY
Connect with your spirit guides and be guided through a channelled process to remember your life’s purpose in this audio workshop.
